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Pied Piper Pic: The More Things Change…


So it seems we are now fully a-pivot to video-conferencing! What a long gavotte this Pied Piper has capered, from Richard’s original music app. Yet, there are certain fixed stars that remain constant, that we may navigate by, constants like: Jian Yang, though an exceptional programmer, does not fully grasp the concept of the “prank call.”

Comments (26)

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  1. Hey Erlich Bachman. . . . .

    I’m a you from the past. Before you got fat and a sad. . . .I’m still ugly and stupid though.

    I’m Erlich Bachman!

    1. JIAN YANG!

      First, prank calls don’t work on company message boards, respect the sanctity of the boards! Second. . . sexual dynamo? I can hear you jerking it to Hentai porn from the living room. . . . .and not the tasteful elegant kind! 名誉と Meiyo to

      You owe me rent.

      1. Guys,

        This is fun and all. But we really should consider that other business partners and potential employees may be looking at these boards and using that information to value the legitimacy of these operations.

        lets keep it clean guys.

  2. Will it replace Google? no? oh. Maybe I don’t understand it any more than Monica. But, we’re both girls. Can you fancy it up and give it a purple interface? Will it work to compress Kim K’s bootay? Yeah, grasping at straws.

    Hey, tell Yang I’ve got another prank for him. He can call Erlich and ask him ‘whats the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can’t hear an en zyme.)

    Anyway, hurry for the all access rollout, I’ll be one of your first subscribers, but i want a hotline to Jared. Couple of phone calls and he’ll man up real good.

  3. Woo~~ is it amazing, Missy Hetong, Wang? Work of genius. Hopefully, someday I could build one company and be with you. : )
    Life is full of wonders. Daydream may come true. You are the wonder of all, the one i want seen.
    just not work for http://hooli.com/

  4. Question: can they sue Hooli and Jack for making Richards idea of the box? Is Jack violating the non-disclosure agreement employees sign as they exit any company? There is more proof on this than there was when Hooli sued Richard.

    1. This is tricky. The box is equipped with Endframe’s algorithm. What Jack Baker contributed to Hooli is the idea of the box, and the client relationship with Maleant. Although Jack might bring the specs to Hooli (very possibly), there is no proof.

  5. Isn’t it true that compressing an already compressed file just makes it bigger?

    So how does “middle out” accomplish that? Does it decompress it first and THEN compress it again?

    Also, I have a great idea to convert Roomba’s to serve as building security drones with Tazers!

    Eat more bananas.

    …and for Pete’s sake get Richard laid.

  6. Will Monica be working for Pied Piper now? Can you ask her to call me? I think something is wrong with her phone. Whenever I call it always goes straight to voice mail.

Problem 1:

Single Points of Failure

Libraries are vulnerable to losing their collection because all of their books are contained at a single location. Say, for instance, that there was a fire, or a flood, or a vandal defaced John James Audubon’s masterpiece Birds of America by giving all the Warblers human genitalia. Even worse, if the vandal recruited bird haters from other neighborhoods and got ahold of all the copies of the book in existence, it could be lost crude doodles forever. It would be a tragedy on par with the destruction of the Library of Alexandria.

The Problem

Because Birds of America is centralized in one public location, it’s susceptible to permanent deletion. The same goes for content on the Internet — storing all your family photos on a single account in a cloud service? They could all be wiped away if someone hacked your account or corrupted the host servers.

The Solution

Our solution: In our decentralized library, we would duplicate and distribute multiple copies of Birds of America to your neighbors — if you need a copy, you would just go to your neighbor’s house. As our Pipernet town of mobile devices grows, so do the number of neighbors who might have a copy of your book. And the more potential copies there are available, the more secure the book is.

That’s what our new internet will allow you to do too: spread your personal files on devices across the world, so they’re completely safe from bad actors manipulating or deleting them.


All copies of your files in a well-known, hackable location = RISKY!

Files copied and distributed to multiple locations = SAFE!

Problem 2:

No Privacy

In order to check out books, you must have a library card — an ID that links back to your real world identity. That library card reveals all the books you’ve ever checked out, where you returned them, and whether they were returned on time.

The Problem

The tech titans collect data profiles on us too, and theirs are far more comprehensive. They amass thousands of personal data points by tracking our activities in both the online and physical worlds.

Users don’t own or control their own data, so it can be used against them. Take, for instance, Richard’s lawyer Pete Monahan, who had his probation revoked when the state retrieved his library records. Which was… probably a good idea. But for this metaphor’s purposes: bad that they can access that information!

On the web, our data profile is far more detailed, the laws around privacy even looser, and more freedoms are at stake. For example, what if Hooli sold your search data to an insurance company who then denied you coverage because you’ve HooliSearch-ed “kindest Palo Alto based Cardiologist” a few too many times?

The Solution

Replace library cards with anonymous identification cards which are impossible to connect to your real world identity. Instead of using a library card (linked to your name, address, etc.) to check out books, you would swipe a nondescript card (containing no personal details). Your activity would be tracked to keep the system stable, but your identity would not be siphoned and sold. I, for example, would no longer check out books as "Donald Dunn," but rather the nom de guerre "h3w0vbk37vpm."

That’s what our new internet will allow you to do too: use its apps and services without compromising your privacy.


Trading your identity and data for online services = RISKY!

Using services anonymously so nobody can target you = SAFE!

Problem 3:

Censorship and Manipulation

Because a town’s library is run by a small group of administrators, they could theoretically decide what books are available to its people. They could even decide to ban Birds of America, depriving young birders of Audubon’s elegant illustrations, pored over page by page under a government-issued blanket after lights out, giving you hope that even a slender-framed, shivering boy could grow to be as majestic as a Hooded Merganser.

The Problem

On the internet, multinational corporations can screen content, or even “adapt” their services to fit the local government’s requests. In both libraries and on the Web, we’re susceptible to data being censored or manipulated by intermediaries.

The Solution

A peer-to-peer lending system backed up by a fully public ledger, allowing you to send and receive books freely to anybody in the world without worrying about censorship or interference. Want to add Catcher in the Rye, Fahrenheit 451, or your controversial essay on Audubon’s coloring techniques? No problem, even if the town surrounded you with pitchforks to ban them, these vital texts would be available to share neighbor to neighbor, impossible to delete.

That’s what our new internet will allow you to do too: exchange messages and files directly with their intended receiver, disperse ideas and information free from threats of censorship.


Pushing all transactions through a central authority = OPPRESSIVE!

Establishing a peer to peer exchange system based on an immutable public ledger = FREE!

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